At the beginning of this year I decided I wouldn’t be buying any more clothes – but turns out that wasn’t really working for me! About three months ago I had what I’m calling my ‘clothes crisis’. Although I had a very large wardrobe, my clothes just weren’t giving me any satisfaction. I felt that I looked childish, unprofessional and in some cases a bit messy. For a while I’ve been reading a blog called A Small Wardrobe, which is all about minimising your lifestyle. Whereas I don’t think my wardrobe would completely count as minimalist, I have managed to cut down a lot of my clothes and decided to just keep pieces I really love and wear all the time. (I have a bad habit of getting attached to clothes and just wearing the same few things!)
After a few self-conscious teenage years, I finally became accustomed to my appearance and instead turned to improving my personality. Of course, I know this is not yet perfect and by no means stable. But philosophy has helped me a lot and on top of that, starting a blog has really opened my eyes to what I want to do with my life – which is great. Most of my time spent in school was spent saying ‘I don’t know’ so I know the frustration of lacking direction. Finally with my attitude and passions (mostly) in check, it seems I have turned full circle into a vicious spout of ‘clothes crisis’.
Yes, I know avid readers, it was only a couple of posts ago where I said I was nipping this retail therapy obsession in the butt. Well when a dusty pink, loose and comfy sweater dress, from your favourite brand (UO) that always fits you to a tee pops into your inbox, then try telling me it’s resistible. Clearly it wasn’t to me and I will likely have a picture as soon as I wear it out.
But back to the point – which has been inspired by this ill habit – Recently I have been feeling slightly perplexed about my appearance. Mostly it’s the notion I look younger than I am and also don’t look professional enough. It’s also spurred new experiments with makeup which I’ll admit is going disastrously. Note from the wise, natural is always a winner.
Despite this piece of advice, I really have nothing going in the ways of my ‘outer skin’. I’ve always expressed the typical philosophies of ‘looks don’t matter’, ‘beauty is not skin deep’, ‘beauty is in the eyes of the beholder’. Now, to me, these expressions feel more like excuses – dismissing the issue is not helping at all. If you don’t like something change it, damn.
My outer skin can feel like a barrier for my anxieties. Especially now I’m really pushing myself to write, and take bolder steps towards being a freelancer, I am a believer in the power of a good outfit. It’s why we dress up when we go on dates, or when we have an interview. There’s something about looking confident that makes us feel confident. On the brink of change I’m just gearing myself for a battle – my ability to adapt things is going to shine soon.
My favourite part is the shoes. A good pair of heels to help me stride into my future. Perhaps more shopping should wait until the summer though. I’m forecasting a lovely array of dresses and light jackets.
All in the name of confidence, of course.
Here’s a life tip for you – live partly in your mind. It’s a place to hide your secrets, the only place others can’t reach. Sometimes I get compliments that make me laugh (inside). Compliments such as ‘you’re so nice!’ but this is not correct to me. Though I refuse to say anything rude/hurtful to anyone, I can’t deny those kind of thoughts don’t come to my head. It’s difficult to tamper most thoughts so thankfully I have learnt to control my mouth.
When it comes to Autumn this year, there’s only one word of style that comes to mind, RED. It should never be underestimated, the power a good red lipstick has to make you walk a little taller and feel a little invincible.